i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
Stop treating my vagina like a slapchop.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
I just want to be naked all the time but not in a sexual, come-hither and look at my ass sort of way. In a slightly chubby yet not ashamed way as I eat Taco Bell and lay on soft fuzzy blankets.
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Okay hun. Well my neighbors haven't called the cops yet so I think we're good. No more burning in the yard.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
I'm going to CVS to meet the Craigslist guy who is going to buy my underwear. If I don't text you within the next hour, plz assume that I have been abducted by a stranger with an underwear fetish.
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