my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
she definitely didn't appreciate it when you justified bringing her home by yelling to me "fat bitches need love too"
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I am literally watching TV with sunglasses on because the brightness hurts my hangover
the party picked up after I got pretty drunk...I got kicked in the fucking head by a tiny lesbian...she was 5'1" I did not think she could do it...i was very wrong
Randomize
