Can Purell be used as lube?
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
you proceeded to scream out that it's your birthday to everyone who walked by before you collapsed in the middle of the street. happy 21st birthday to you.
Partial kegs from last night are currently in my bathtub, which leads me to 2 questions: 1. What are you doing tonight? 2. Can I use your shower?
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
Remember those two guys in our frat that would no homo everything? I just got an invitation to their wedding.
Randomize
