Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
judging by the pasta sauce and dirty pans i spent my blackout being emeril
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
Well I just took a pregnancy test... So how's your thanksgiving?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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