Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
I'm holding onto the sink for dear life. Pretty sure if Iet go I'll turn into a shit propelled man rocket.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
how I know last night was a good night: this morning I found a bottle of tapatio, a bag of chicken and a bag of popcorn in my purse.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
