When you only buy popcorn and condoms at the grocery store they know whats up.
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
no. it doesnt count as road head if youre parked
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
It would just be icing on the fucked up cake we're baking, if he got me pregnant.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
Vagic. Defined as a kind of magic one has over a girl's vagina. Used in a sentence... he's an accomplished vagician.
I told my fuck buddy that I wanted one of his arms to take home with me to hold onto in bed and he was hurt that I didn't want to bring him, like as a person, home to my family. I feel like you and only you could appreciate this.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Why is there a pair of panties on my front lawn?
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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