eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
One reason I don't come to Portland. I saw 8 guys I have had sex with last night. At the same party.
By 8 I mean 9.
And by 9 I mean 10.
I can't see straight with both eyes and ive only been at the bar for an hour. Someone else typed this for me.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
I'm on the couch watching HGTV googling giant boob Halloween costumes so life is swell
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
