I'm not a real person
I'm sorry, everyone knows that
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Then me, her, and her mom snorted tequila. The bartender was in shock.
my hand froze to the top of can of beer cuz i fell asleep outside. i decided to find a way to open the bottom of the can before addressing my severe frostbite. PRIORITIES!
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
Randomize
