I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
I wish a box of wine came w a hose. It'd be so much easier to drink from.
How do i politely tell him his dick looks like it went thru a meat grinder?
2 reasons we need to wear those onesies to the bar more ofter 1) comfy as shit 2) we both still got laid\n\nHow can you resist that kinda night?
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
These are the last few fleeting sober moments of the day for me. If there is anything you need me to do today, please tell me now
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
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