Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
thank god dogs can't talk. they see way to much.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
He dated me before I started drinking. I feel like he deserves a consolation bj for all the effort he had to put in to get in my pants.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
The last thing I remember is teaching our waffle house waitress to do the stanky leg and promising the grill cook we would come see him at his other job.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Hypothetically speaking...if I was arrested in Wisconsin, say Kenosha county, would you post my bail all the way from Oregon? If yes, will you also accept my collect call in t-minus 13 hours?
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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