Your tits are I can't wait for
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
whose parrot is this?
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
