Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm sorry for the texts and anything that I said that may have caused confusion, pain or irritation. I shall not be drinking again. Furthermore I will not be keeping a phone on me should I fail to adhere to the prior statement.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
All of my friends are talking about changing their lives because they have an alcohol addiction and I'm over here reminding my boss that it's national beer day.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
Randomize
