At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Chugged a beer while being walked to the bathroom by campus police to pour the beers out.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
Would "deck the halls with penises " be an appropriate event title? I know peni is the plural but flow of the tongue as well
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
just chugging fertility tea and vodka, no big deal.
Last night I made him sit on my bed and finish my burrito bowl as I chanted "brucey" over and over until he was done like they did in Matilda with the chocolate cake
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
