I just had sex in the back of an ambulance. Call me.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I wish my grandma would stop using the phrase "he pulled out" when she's talking about her contractor quitting his job.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
it was like weight watchers had a halloween party.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
You're like the curious george of whores
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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