He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
SURVIVED FINALS. CAN'T DIE FROM ALCOHOL POISONING. NOTHER SHOT. CAPS.
Decided to go explore a half built apartment complex at 4 a.m and leave a 3 block obstacle course in the alley ways on the way home.
Oh trust me, i am. It's like magic, but instead of rabbits and doves its orgasms- He just keeps pulling them out of nowhere.
On the back of that comment, I've formed a theory that as a result of my brainwashing your drunk self actually believes that beards are your calling.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Just saw the german running around on campus. Thought of his small penis.
As you should.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
from across the room i saw you look into your beer and whisper "i love you"
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
