No. I broke it. Note to self, never take a shower with your phone in your pocket.
I'm think I may have given your ex's number to a convicted sex offender.
Win!
it's a well known fact that sluts are attracted to bright colors
american apparel?
try lime green
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
If there was a game called "keeping your legs shut," I would lose every time.
I am currently sitting on a candy bar to warm it up cause it was in the fridge so I can eat it while watching the last song and smoking weed by myself
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
That's like a fucking falcon or some shit. I don't know birds but I know that is not a bird you fuck with.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
Randomize
