we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
All I need right now is some mouthwash, dignity, and security camera footage...
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
Please don't try and hook up with one of your high school teacher's friends
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
