Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
are you serious?? is your clit as sensitive as your emotions
i wish
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
the EMT asked how you broke your nose and you said, "you know, the usual wear and tear."
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
you grabbed the waitors dick and yelled '2nd base' and then he gave you his number. I hate your life.
Ive decided I'm sending thank you notes to all the bars for graduation.
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
Randomize
