Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
He yelled "HERE COMES THE WARMTH" before he pissed his pants. In front of the whole party.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
And for some reason I just want to have sex with EVERYTHING
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
Me too. We could do it like prostitutes. No kissing on the mouth.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
Randomize
