If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I feel like if your cat could talk she would call me a cunt.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
I will show up on your front porch in a wet t shirt and some mac and cheese
I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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