On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
Saddest moment ever is discovering when your cat no longer wants to get high with you.
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
You were talking about masturbating on the phone then said you had to go because golden girls was on then you called me back saying you seen that episode already.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
ETA 20 minutes and if you greet me at the door with a gin & tonic I’ll give you head.
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