I'm on a mission to free the leash kids. Like liberating the Israelites from Egypt. Only better.
Yo, if someone calls you asking for John Stamos, just go with it.
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
Every now and then I'll meet one who is talented in the art of shower gymnast.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
After 8 hours of circus trick sex, his parents are both hugging me and kissing me on the cheek asking when I'm coming back over. Score?
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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