dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.
You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
mid-sex i was thinking.. these are not the right balls slapping me
Last time we were that stoned we made a "everything you can fit in the blender" shake. Didn't end well..
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
For a limited time only, free special muffin with the referral of a loyal dro customer! Have it for breakfast and be happy off your ass all day! Guaranteed! New member must buy at least an eighth. Oh and O's are on sale for 280.
You. Win. At. Life.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
Hey I'm trying to get back with my ex I'mm done doing whatever we were doing I hope things workout for you
Weird flex but ok.
Randomize
