im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
there is a hole burned clean through my text book on forestry law and I saw you walking around with a blowtorch last night. Hope you have $160 on ya...
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
Some old bald man is a 100,000 dollar Audi sports car just revved his engine at me and held out his phone at me trying to get my number. I hate the valley.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
I don't care what the Chinese zodiac calendar says . . . 2015 is the year of the cock!
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
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