I'm really into asian looking animals
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
okay, prove you're not drunk to me. write 5 true sentences about me with correct grammar.
I am sober. Because I don't drunk. It is bad. People die. I like Domenico because o he bag women what up?
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Jesus tap dancing Christ rock out with your cock out is supposed to be just an expression. And even if it weren't no one wants pics bro.
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
Apparently I handcuffed myself to the dishwasher...
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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