Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
There is a guy standing at my bar right now wearing an affliction SUIT. I can't wait on him.
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
You should know that Team Beyonce's Vagina dominated in pong last night
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
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