So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I don't know what's worse: going to the liquor store at 9am or knowing that its open at 9am
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
She kept asking for cigarettes, than just put them in her purse as "savings"
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
All I know is I woke up in the back seat of my car, with the engine on, and my gps navigated to florida.
Randomize
