Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I must be really high or they really did just bring me a banana split instead of a burger
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
