i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
The girl I hooked up with in exchange for Ramen freshmen year is living with the girl I currently wish to bang.
Try oodles of noodles this time.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Randomize
