Me. At least after what I've been through.
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
oh i have no idea about his personality. i imagine it's the same as it was- except now combined with a receding hairline and a beer gut
so, I mean this in the straightest way possible, but don't you ever just feel like you owe Jon Stewart a blowjob...
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
He was the only one not on Xanax so he holds the key to what actually happened last night
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
