chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I love that my idea of a romantic gesture to you is to send you a picture of my vomit saying "wish you were here". You voluntarily dated me. For six years ish.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
i want to have his babies. i NEED to. shit i wont even ask for child support, he's that goodlooking.
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
It's amazing where one well timed dick pic can get you in life.
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Everyone says I win the strip club
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
Randomize
