Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Bts the comment you were making during that picture was "look we have penises"
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
Don't park in the garage. I installed a stripper pole while drunk and it's kinda in the way
And leave it to John to ask the cabby to make a Porno in his cab
Like hey, "you just spent $135k to go to a nobody law school to drive a mini van, be a dj, live in a smalllll ass apartment that smells like cats and your girlfriend fucks other guys."
I fell asleep on the air hockey table and someone turned it on, scariest shit ever when you're that fucked up
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
Andddddd I'm drunk
Andddddd it's Tuesday
That's your opinion.
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