I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
foreskin is a definite game changer
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
Everything is scary i hate being an adult i hate responsibility tell me a dick joke
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
