hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He made me brush his hair afterwards because it made him feel like a ken Barbie.
God I hope the sex was good.
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize
