just used a blowie as payment for him having to take the dog out to let her poop.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
He brought me four big burritos and two joints! He can sleep with his bank teller any time he wants!
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
i like that he makes me laugh. those are like my two favorite things. laughing and fucking.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
Randomize