I'm in love with you.
huh?
Don't be nervous. I'm just saying - if you had a dick, I'd suck it.
all the douches that like ed hardy are the same douches that were obsessed with lisa frank
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
Class is significantly more awkward when you know that your teacher knows what you look like with your legs behind your head... Just saying.
they shut off the water. shaving my legs with soda. that desperate.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
We don't need a hotel, we'll just sleep in the post office.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
I just had a vision of confetti exploding out of someone's vagina to the sound of air horns... I think that would be welcoming.
I like the way you think.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Just stay awake and booze cruise it to class. How are you a senior and have never went to class drunk? No excuses, I have a better gpa.
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
just saw two mice fucking on our bed...i think its time to find a new place to live
Randomize
