Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
NExt question... Do i wanna sleep under my palm tree
YES.
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
She's riding a tiny four-wheeler and has a Dos Equis in her hand. I at least have to meet her.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Maybe i don’t have a tell. Maybe wine is my poker face.
I knew how blacked out you were when you started doing that thing where you dance around and call yourself the Black Swan.
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
