That's what you get for not wearing a bra and jumping on a trampoline
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
David pulled a magic mike again and started stripping on every street sign we passed.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Randomize
