i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
In the middle of switching positions, we shared a line of coke. It's was like a modern-day 'Lady and the Tramp.'
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Just sharpening my eyeliner with a butterfly knife. You know. Typical weekday morning.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
On the upside I'm hairless from the waist down. On the downside, I just chemically burned my labia
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
They want a bedroom just for their cats. And you thought we were gay.
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