at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
I just want to let you know how hung over I am today and I fucked a girl in a kangaroo costume last night.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
just put a ruler in a cup trying to measure how much ivve had to drink..... God help me
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
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