You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Brogan sounds similar to Bridget...sorta.
Every girl's name is automatically translated to "Baby/Milk Carrier" in my brai
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I was really excited when he said that condoms didn't fit him, then he added "they fall right off"...
Because at some point last night we decided that shotgunning beers from a paint stick was a good idea
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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