Pre-pickelized cucumber-hand invasion!! RUN!!!!!!!!!!
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
I'm buying a chandelier at walmart. WHO'S CLASSY NOW, BITCHES.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
I forgot not everyone drinks wine out of the bottle. My grandma just asked if i needed a glass with a disappointing look.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
Just streaked campus for a bottle of patron...maybe you're right...I might have a drinking problem...
I think my nap took me to another dimension
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
I will 100% jerk off using my own tears as lube before I'd ever bang a 4.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
