where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Its like a relationship where they cockblock each other.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
Randomize
