Operation Purity has been aborted
Because when I say 'You shouldn't drink anymore', she hears, 'I personally challenge you to chug 3 more mixed drinks'
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
I just haven't been myself lately. I slept with a guy 21 years older than me and I've been wearing my hair in a center part.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
This guy dressed as a piece of paper for Halloween, I felt it was only necessary to sign his penis
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
I asked him to have birthday sex with me via xbox live
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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