Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
Would it be weird to tell him that on his b'day he's dressing up and we're having weird Jesus sex?
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Just an FYI i'm going to get drunk as shit while you are on duty and attempt to not fall into the bathtub again.
Rodger that.
Sorry about the confusion with the nudes last night that was rude
Randomize
