My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
mark tries to be a total badass to make up for the fact that he's a poor man's pete wentz
I hate how you keep a running list of people who have seen me naked.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
I know that was a dream because I woke up and there was no pizza
The hookers weren't a dream get tested
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
I was so drunk last night I asked a rando at the bar to take a picture with me cause I thought he was in the band
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
The oven caught fire. I put it out, but called the fire department just to make sure it was okay since the smoke wasn't going away
You just wanted to meet firemen
Let's do something tonight. I feel like setting things on fire.
Randomize