I wanna do crazy things to you in a tent
fuckk wrong person
.. who was that for? a girlscout?
im six kinds of drunk right now
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I couldn't fall back asleep it was too bright so I just took my sports bra off and put it over my eyes
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
Hey.. Lock your door. There's a drunk girl walking around in here. She just came in my room and peed on my chair.
Randomize
