You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
how you manage to cockblock me from 500 miles away still baffles me.
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
Almost there.
define "almost". like I have enough time to watch a youtube video or oh shit, put on some goddamn pants because they're in the driveway.
She busted her face in a tragic twerking accident. Marking the 2nd time I have peed my pants laughing.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize
