I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
One fish gets drugged and suddenly I'm labeled a bad pet owner. This is so unfair.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
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