Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
omg dinner turned into a foam party this is weiriiid
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
My brother is wearing glitter eyeshadow and split leg skinny jeans
You've been usurped as King of the Gays
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
